Today's mood was on and off kinda ?

i dont know...
i had a dream tht was related to him .
which wasnt really kinda appropiate to start off the day with ...

woke up feeling pretty much bothered by it.
but i got better as hours went by ...

made myself sandwitch for lunch and hurried online =)
chatted with friends ...

and as usual .. mixed into the chat group of m5er's in my msn.
was just a normal day kinda...

then all of a sudden...
''jin'' has been added into the conversation ...

at first i was like HUH ?
and it took me a while to really figure out tht it was really him.

once i saw him being added into the convo ... i immediately left the conversation chat.

and there i was.. stonning at my screen ....
thinking ... he's back already ? shouldnt he be back till fri?
in like 3 days time ?

while i was thinking.. i got invited back into the conversation chat...
and i kinda managed to see a few sentences before pulling myself out once again...

then i thought to myself...
maybe i should just leave the whole group...

and i did.

i felt kinda sad.. like .. im unable to fit in anymore...

but oh well.. maybe it's better this way?
i wasnt really needed in there anyway...
i'm sure tht he was more welcomed than i was...

and thts when my mood swug low..

moodless =(

SIGH SIGH SIGH . i felt really stressed the whole day...
and its pretty obvious why...

i felt tightness in my chest.. and for the whole day ... i couldnt breathe right.

rawrr~

so i kinda went to distract myself.
drawing... listenin to music... etc etc

then yit hong came online and asked if i wanted to play a few rounds of cs with him..
i was like sure? why not.

and so i did...
i did feeel pretty hyped up afterwards =)

i won him 10-7 , was kinda stressful for me cause i didnt wanna lose.
and i got really happy when i won him.
and yeah.. kinda made my day...

well then queen invited boss's wife over for dinner.
and we chatted...

then i came back to use my comp and kinda blogg hopped around.

and thts when i knew... i did have readers ...
and it was pretty heartwarmin to know .

i always believed tht tht someone still bothered.
flash flash.

but hey? nthin changes. and nthin will change ...
STILL , i will givva big SIGH.

It will just 'hang' on... just like how it does on the head of my bed.

now come to think of it.. i feel pretty retarded tellin a picture good night every night...

but, i'll still hope. tht one day. he will talk to me. like how he used to .
till then, i can only keep dreaming.

alright. enough of emo posts...

i gotta thank muhi . cause we're taklin right now as i type this post.
and its stoppin me from being emo for the night =)
apprecicated. tysm.

OKOK. well anw. for today.. i recieved the sch's letter already.
and heard tht sch doesnt start for me till 11 NOV.

yaaahh ... still so longgg.
and also i heard. tht every season. we have holidays. how cool is tht?
but it doesnt make a diff anw. i cant hangout with anyone but my family .
but its still cool.

okok .. my post today might be a little too wordy and too plain boring.
sorry u guys.

today was just not my day =(

too emo and too sad to end the post with my 'fat' face...
SIGH ~

i guess...
tomorrow will be a new day... hey ?




TA~

This life dont last forever... LaLaLa & it ends here~ 3:40 PM